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Reflections of a Rosicrucian Aspirant
by Richard Koepsel




Table of Contents
  1. Change »  PDF »
  2. Why Do Birds Sing? »  PDF »
  3. Lot's Wife »  PDF »
  4. As We Are Known »  PDF »
  5. Christ and the Cattle »  PDF »
  6. GDP »  PDF »
  7. Adding to the Confusion? »  PDF »
  8. What's in for Me? »  PDF »
  9. Vicarious Atonement »  PDF »
10. In the Movies »  PDF »
11. Supply Side Economics »  PDF »
12. Cosmic Rays »  PDF »
13. Recycling »  PDF »
14. Celebrity »  PDF »
15. Praise »  PDF »
16. Prayers to Saints »  PDF »
17. Books »  PDF »
18. Where it is Most Needed »  PDF »
19. Now We Know in Part »  PDF »
20. The Shepherd's Voice »  PDF »
21. Did Jesus Write This Book? »  PDF »
22. AI »  PDF »
23. Identification »  PDF »
24. The Incarnation Mystery »  PDF »
25. The Invisible Man »  PDF »
26. Consciousness »  PDF »
27. Privacy »  PDF »
28. The Problem of the Self »  PDF »
29. Covid 19 »  PDF »
30. UFOs »  PDF »
31. Closure »  PDF »
32. Winning »  PDF »
33. Loneliness »  PDF »
34. Eviction »  PDF »
35. The God Spot »  PDF »
36. Pain »  PDF »
37. The Problem of Evil »  PDF »
38. Grace, and the Forgiveness of Sins »  PDF »
39. Martyrdom »  PDF »
40. What's New »  PDF »


Winning

“Gnothi se auton”—know thyself—was the first of the three inscriptions chiseled in stone, at the temple of Apollo, at the Delphic Oracle. To candidates, the “self” was the threefold spirit, the spiritual Self, into which consciousness the candidate was initiated. Though not as lofty, the inscription applies also to the personal self. As we struggle in the inner war, we come to know our personality pretty well. We must in order to succeed, to win.

In the inner war, this writer has come to know, that in some respects, his personality is fixed and rigid. This is an impediment for someone seeking to respond to the infinitely subtle and supple Spirit. Knowing something is the first step. One must take action, to follow through on what one knows, as a second step. In an attempt to break up rigidity, he has taken to reading poetry. Poets see things differently from, so called, normal people with accepted standards. Poets’ insights are surprising, just the thing to break up rigidity. So, he reads all sorts of poetry, regularly. He is far from a connoisseur, or a master interpreter, but he goes ahead anyway. There is much in poetry that doesn’t speak to him, but sometimes one line is life changing. One example for this writer is a couplet from Sonnet 119 by Shakespeare:

What Wretched errors hat my heart committed,
Whilst it has though itself so blessed never.

The couplet speaks for itself, with an insight into which, any of us can testify. Too often, has this writer been certain, when in error, (Whilst it has though itself so blessed never) and he has acted in his surety, to his eventual grief. One peculiarity about surety, is that someone else is just as sure of something, which differs from one’s own surety. When one encounters someone of counter certainties, firm opinions clash in arguments.

Some arguments are never won. If sustained, they evolve, and other things evolve from them. In the history of the United States politics, the pendulum of of public opinion swings back and forth between the political left and the political right. Some swings span several generations. Whenever a swing occurs, it is fascinating how advocates of the new direction often believe they are offering new ideas, when they are actually offering old ideas in new dressings. The dressings evolve, and society evolves, but the evolutionary changes are not, necessarily, to the liking of either extreme. Winning isn’t necessary for progress.

There are arguments about progress itself, though the participants in these arguments are not aware of it. This writer has participated in one of these arguments for years, off and on, without realizing the argument was about progress. The subject of this argument was winning. The premise can be stated in a simple question, “When is a game won?” At first glance, the answer seems obvious. It would seem to be won when the time period has expired, the decisive tally is scored, one player is check-mated, or whatever the rules state. In this view, the outcome is determined in the activity, in the moment, in the game itself. Thus, players never give up. This is in the spirit of Yogi Berra who said “it isn’t over, until it’s over.” One person who participated in this argument, and who was not someone who entered into competitions, did not see it this way. The view of this person was that the outcome was a matter of destiny. In other words, the World Series was determined before it began.

The argument from destiny before the fact of activity, seems absurd, especially to participating competitors. Why play the game if the outcome is predetermined? To a competitor there would be no pride in accomplishment, if the winner was foreshown. For Rosicrucian aspirants this argument cannot be easily disregarded. In The Rosicrucian Cosmo-Conception, and other Rosicrucian literature, we learn that, working together with the Recording Angels, we design a life in which certain events are mandatory. Winning the World Series could be one of them. We even learn that individuals, who balk upon seeing the images of predetermined events at the quickening, only make matter worse.

Evidence of this view is not only found in the Rosicrucian philosophy. It exists in pop culture. A few years ago, the U.S. Army experimented with clairvoyance, and other forms of ESP. They came up with something called “remote viewing,” because clairvoyance didn’t fit well in military vocabulary, even though clairvoyance was what it actually was. Though there was some success with some things, the program was abandoned because it didn’t produce the intelligence the Army wanted. Some of the trainers retired from the Army and commercialized the training. Often, the training was offered in Law Vegas. In advertisements for the program, prospective participants were told they could win back their entrance fee, with successful sports betting. There are even schools that give advanced training in Remote Viewing for sports betting. Some of them make astounding claims of accuracy. To this writer’s knowledge, none of this has been proven, or disproven. If there is an advantage with Remote Viewing, it is meager. Besides, if it is unsuccessful, some might be too ashamed to admit their losses. Remote Viewing sports betting, is an uncertain activity. Could it be that this is so because some games are predestined and some are not?

The issue of predestination applies to all of life, and the astrological environment in which it is lived out. How much of life is predestined? or, in inverse, in how much of life do we have freedom to create? Clearly, not all of life is predestined. If it were, we would be automatons going through the motions of life, like preprogrammed machines. If it were, freedom and self-determination would be illusions, and life, in this respect, would be a cruel hoax, and not a divine blessing. Since hard data about freedom and destiny is unavailable to him, the writer must rely on personal experience to try to answer these questions.

This writer does have a modicum of usable personal experience, from which to have come to partial answers to these questions. It is gleaned from about fifty-seven years of astrological study. At first, he had a vainglorious, self-conceit in picturing himself becoming a wizard of prediction. With youthful folly, he accepted a challenge from skeptics to predict some world events. When he did so, his success shocked even himself. The skeptics were impressed, but not for long. They wanted more data points. It was then that this writer realized that there would always be demands for more, …, and more. With some misgivings, he plowed forward. Soon he was spending an enormous amount of time in this activity. Then there was a truth session. In it the “still small voice” within came forth with searing words. It went something like: “Why are you spending all of this time and effort trying to predict events about which you can do nothing?” It went on: “Why don’t you give yourself to doing things to serve others, in matters where something can be done?” The admonishment was taken to heart and that was the end of a cometary career in one form of vanity, not to say that there haven’t been others. After the truth session, his efforts were redirected into spiritual and astrological counseling on real life issues—less glory, more work and more responsibility, but also more quiet joy.

In counseling there has been some predictive work also, but it is of a different kind, and it is much less. Taking this direction has been intentional, because this writer has come to see, that understanding why events come about, is more important when they come about; except when knowing “when” helps to understand “why”. In horoscopy there are questions similar to those in predicting world events, but most of them are not germane to this essay, the purpose of which, is to explore the relationship of freedom and predictability in human destiny.

In the middle ages astrologers were fatalistic, especially Arabian astrologers, because of their belief that the will of Allah, as it is manifest in destiny, is absolute. Since the Renaissance, astrology has become less fatalistic. Christian astrologers, believing “you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free,” separated themselves from fatalism. This is why William Lilly titled his masterpiece Christian Astrology Modestly Treated of in Three Books. Despite a growing belief in freedom, the progression away from fatalism and prediction, toward freedom in creative and spontaneous living, using astrology, has been slow. Even today there is an unspoken fatalism among astrologers, that lies slightly beneath the gloss of positivity. Considering there are so many talented and studious practitioners of astrology, one wonders why this is so. This writer cannot speak for other astrologers, or astrology as a whole, but he can speak for himself.

After many years of practice, with many horoscopes, this writer can see that, for most people, most seeming freedom, is mostly a delusion. This is an outrageous statement, which demands elucidation and substantiation, in large and small.

In large, looking at a lifetime as a whole, one’s life partner is one of the most important people in one’s life. Many people seek an ideal partner, and will go to extremes, to find and meet that person. Often the ideal partner is a fantasy, but even when it isn’t, the search is. Our lives are not exclusively our own, nor are they formed in isolation. Between lives we build the world, and our lives in it, working together with other beings, some of whom are divine. Our lives are renewals, in a great, ongoing, creative work. Rebirths are fresh restarts but not everything is completely new. Much of life is a carrying out of things initiated in the near or distant past. A completely fresh restart does not happen, any more than a new soul is brought into the creation in the middle of the creation. In this ongoing work, we build working relationships with others. The work isn’t only with things outside of ourselves. We actually build within each other’s lives. It is mostly done by influence but the effect is not minimal. Often, spouses seem to look like each other, as their life together progresses. In meeting potential spouses, it is a pickup line to say “it’s destiny” when one meets someone attractive. Little do most people know, that there is more truth than fiction in that line. It is nearly impossible to avoid someone, with whom one will share one’s most intimate and important destiny, especially if that person is a life partner. Marriages are, indeed, “made in heaven,” before we come to rebirth. One’s time and energy would be better spent in learning about sharing and partnership, than in seeking a mate.

In small, we are wont to believe we are in control of ourselves, which allows us to live life spontaneously in freedom. The reality is that we are mostly creatures of habit, which is neither control nor spontaneity. Even a beginning astrologer can see when one will be jocular, or angry, or whatever. Self-Control, which is a means to freedom, is expressed in self-consciousness. In some spiritual schools, candidates trying to develop clairvoyance are urged to do everything with deliberate self-application. Everything. Even such a trivial thing as tying ones shoelaces is to be done deliberately and not automatically. This practice leaves no gap in attention, for there to be a lapse from spiritual awareness and self-control. In some Christian schools, everything is done for the Christ’s sake as in “this do in remembrance of me.” Everything.

The most important people, and many important events, in our lives are predetermined by us, before we come to rebirth. Most of what is determined during life, is how and why we come to these predetermined people and events. Do we pass through a temptation presented to us in an event ?, or do we lapse into a vice learned in a previous rebirth?. Ironically, it is in some of the non essential things of life, that we have the most freedom of self-determination. The children born to us may be destined, but the things we do with them, do not have to be. They can be free and spontaneous. Ironically, it is in some of the non essential things, that we have the most freedom of self-determination. Things like games. Some of this writer’s fondest memories from childhood were formed when we played games with our mother on Sunday afternoons. Being a Mars ruled family, even simple games were competitive, but they were also intimate. Winning did not seem to have been predetermined, but striving to win was intense. If winning had been predetermined, the games would have been insipid and pointless. The same can be said to be true of life itself. We live life to succeed. We play games to win. If we don’t, it isn’t fair to our opponents, or ourselves. Nonetheless, they are still only games, and if we forget that, we lose the perspective necessary to win. The value of this impersonal attitude, carries into life success, which brings us back to our original question of when games are won, and who wins them.

When a game is over, we know who has won, but we cannot be certain when it was won without a comprehensive vision of destiny, but it had to have been won at some time, either in the moment or between rebirths. Anyone who has participated in an intensely competitive activity, knows it is live, spontaneous, and seemingly indeterminate. However, almost every player, and many spectators, have sensed, that victory in some games was not really determined in the moment. Sometimes it seems like a fluke occurrence, an accident, brings an unexpected victory. Sometimes there is an unexplained lapse in concentration or control, a distraction, or a reversion to a line-ofplay known to be unsuccessful . It was destiny. When the game is over, it is over. We may not know when the game was won, but we know it was won, and it is over and done for all time. Or is it?

The sensing that a victory was a matter of destiny doesn’t make things easier. It is humiliating to lose, and it is humiliating to win as a matter of destiny, rather than by mastery. In either case, there is always a demand for a rematch. Max Heindel tells us the Trojans were reborn as Romans to defeat the Greeks, who were reborn as Carthaginians to both defeat and lose to the Romans, who were later reborn as British to fight the Germans, who were previously Greeks. Some wars, like some arguments, are never won. Fortunately, the Lords of Destiny use both sides to promote spiritual evolution.

We live in both uncertainty and certainty, with regard to destiny. We know with certainty, that we will get exactly what we need, because of the infallibility of the twin laws of cause and consequence, and rebirth. We live with uncertainty because we cannot yet determine all of the events of our lives. The House does not lose overall to Revote Viewing sports bettors in Las Vegas. The reason for that may be, that the winners of all games are not predetermined, only some of them, while the knowledge of permutations and probabilities of the House, spans both. We do not see pictures of all of the events of our coming life at the quickening, only some of them. In deliberate, self-conscious actions, we can prove to ourselves that we are not automatons passing through a completely predetermined life. In winning games, we know that we have determined some events in our lives because, in victory, we have proved it to ourselves. In this milieu of certainty and uncertainty, questions arise, the answers to which, would be advantageous to evolutionary progress.

How many events in life are predetermined? Without well trained clairvoyance, one cannot give an accurate answer. We know it varies from individual to individual, and from rebirth to rebirth. From the astrological writings of Max Heindel, we have rough guidelines to answer this question. He averred that many, or strong, astrological significators in fixed signs indicate a more predetermined life. Similarly, a strong Saturn, in pleasant or unpleasant aspects, indicates a more destined life. Other astrologers seem to have found validity that close aspects with fixed stars mean an eventful life. Many astrological statements, concerning this matter, could provide a more clear determination of the matter, but we would likely remain uneasy with any answer to this question, that is not based on definite foreknowledge. Even the Teacher is not certain of the outcome of the final trial of a candidate for initiation. One wonders if this kind of information is valuable at all. It might be helpful if one feels a need to brace one’s self to meet destiny, but such knowledge has also been known to also paralyze individuals in fear and a feeling of doom. It is wiser to develop faith sufficient to meet whatever destiny presents us. Besides, we already have events which we know are coming, for which we do not prepare ourselves well, to meet them.

Any event, predetermined or not, is important. An event is an objectification. An event, such as a victory, is when something potential becomes something actual, something factual. It is a moment of truth. In a game it usually determines who is a better player. Because an event is a materialization, it is subject to all of the illusions to which materializations are prone. One of the illusions is that events tend to become ends in themselves. The game becomes the all, or winning becomes the all. Predetermined events in destiny aren’t important for themselves. They are important for what we put into them and, especially, what we get out of them. Destiny is not important as an end, it is important for facilitating ongoing evolutionary progress. It provides creative feedback, and prevents fallback.

Since predetermined events are important, it would be helpful to distinguish them from other events, preferably before they occur. With foreknowledge, we can plan to get the most out of events. This seems to be the reason why we see them at the quickening. However, once we enter the dense physical body to stay, they are lost to our waking consciousness—a good reason to expand our waking consciousness. Trained clairvoyance into the memory of nature in the world of thought, is the most sure way to see predetermination, but that is not possible for most people who could benefit from this knowledge. No astrological method, known to this writer, can disclose predestined events without error, either before, or even after, the fact. Intuition is the only tool available to most people, but because of our materialistic preoccupation, we often do not recognize it. Some sports gamblers have hunches. They flatter themselves, by thinking they are intuitions. If they are really intuitions, they are distorted, because selfishness shuts intuition down, or distorts its interpretation.

When are events determined? When are predetermined events known? These questions still confound us. In answer to both questions, players in a game would say in the game itself. That might be true of most games but, according to the Rosicrucian philosophy, it is not true to life. The Rosicrucian Cosmo-Conception, which is the product of many clairvoyant investigations and corroborations, tells us predetermined events are built into the archetype of the coming life, as much as hundreds of years before birth. Foreknowledge of them is possible at any time until they occur. Recognition of them can be gained at various times before actual occurrence. For example, things are manifest in the ethers, before they are finalized in the chemicals. Even unconscious Invisible Helpers pass through the ethers, when returning to their dense physical bodies. If they pay attention, when returning to the body, they sometimes see events materializing through the ethers days, or even weeks, before those events are completed in the chemicals. It pays to be aware upon awakening. From this example, we can see that practices like remote viewing in sports betting, are possible in some cases, but not likely in most.

Events are finalizations of actions. Events are objectifying. Events are the fruits of our labors. Not all events are what we intended when we began our endeavor—nobody wins every game. Whether successful, relative to our intentions, or not; events are successful in disclosing the quality of efforts, and help us to understand what we have put into them. “By their fruits ye shall know them.” Our deeds stand for themselves. There is no evolutionary progress without the stepping and marking stones, that events are. In the retrospection after the events of the day, we find errors, flaws and weaknesses, as well as confirmations and recognitions of strengths and principles successfully applied. The post game analysis of a master chess game may last for decades, and influence generations of players. Understanding life events is much more difficult than understanding a chess game. There are a multitude of factors in life events, and there are more than two players. Maneuvering life events is more like sailing on an ocean, then keeping one’s feet on a path. Determination is common to both activities. Events are determinations.

In games, winning means that one player (or team) determines more, or the most, crucial factors of the game. One chess savant once said, it is the person who makes the second last mistake, that wins the game. Determination means control. The main factors of control in a game are will and ability. Both are the consequence of evolutionary application. The relationship of control and success raises an unexpected paradox. It is a paradox of freedom and control We do not usually associate freedom with control. For example, if our lives are controlled, we feel we lack freedom. Ironically, if our lives are out of control, we forfeit freedom. To the degree that we exercise self-control, do we have success in life, and gain more freedom. A jazz musician cannot freely improvise and create, unless he can control himself and his instrument. Self-control for life success is far more difficult than determining a game, or improvising a solo.

There is one crucial factor in the relationship of freedom and control, the individual.To the degree that one exercises control, is that one free. It is the individual, not the opponent or the world, that determines success.

From every pow’r that holds the world in chains
Man frees himself when self-control he gains.

Freedom is skill in self-controlled living.

It is clear that some people are more free than others. Some people win more often than others. One wonders “What is the limit?” Goethe’s quote would imply there is no limit. There must be a limit, but a limit with a condition not given by Goethe. If each individual evolved to be perfect, as our Lord asked us to, who would win games? Everyone would be in control and free to determine every game, but not all can win. Would every game end in a draw? It seems likely that, if each individual evolved to be perfect, there would be no predetermined events in life. For us, life would be completely free and spontaneous. Life would also seem to our present consciousness to be chaotic except for one factor, evolution. To reach the standard given to us by Christ, we must evolve a new kind of consciousness with new values.

In the Darwinian conception of evolution, competition is the chief driving factor. The Darwinian view ignores the preponderate factors of cooperation and symbiosis in nature. Even parasites promote progress. Some Rosicrucian aspirants would suggest, that even the competition between cheetahs, and antelopes is really a cooperation between their respective Group Spirits to help their charges to improve. Perhaps nature and evolution are not as savage as we make them out to be. It is only in humans that competition has become predominant and destructive, even cooperation among humans is used as a means to dominate. Humans try function outside of, or above nature, but our behavior isn’t the thing of beauty that we see in nature. It is destructive and self-destructive. It seems to be a matter of winning at any cost, and losing everything. We need to shift from perpetual competition to unending cooperation.

To approach free and spontaneous living, we must evolve toward creative cooperation. Because we have individuated, we cannot readopt a Group Spirit to do that for us. Even the thought of it is offensive to a free being. We must move forward to cooperation, and it must be voluntary. We must find a higher, common purpose. In behavior, for Christian Mystical aspirants, this means aspiring and awakening to altruism. This means we must go deeper into the heart of our being. We must transcend the Human Spirit to the Life Spirit. This is done by finding the essence of our selfhood in that from which all selves are derived. This Self of Selves, that is this essence, is the love-wisdom principle of the Godhead. It is the essence of life. To know this, is to chose purpose, over the goal of winning. Purpose is open-ended, and spiritually boundless.

Progress to altruism, and thinking in terms of the other, and the all, is slow. All evolutionary progress is slow. There will be intermediary steps along the way. As we approach the Aquarian Age, the time for altruism is ripening. Aquarius is the sign that rules freedom and altruism. It is also the sign of impersonal attitudes, which means we can give our all to something for its own sake, without personal attachment, without personal strain. Acting impersonally, one can give more of one’s self, without the onus of ego. Games are included. Some New-Age aspirants have already developed games where cooperation replaces competition, and everyone wins.

We say we are approaching the Aquarian Age, because the vernal, equinoctial point is approaching the constellation of Aquarius. The Aquarian Age is for the world at large. The opposite point is for the few, the esoteric aspirants. The point opposite to vernal equinox is approaching the constellation of Leo. As aspirants to the Mysteries, we respond to Leo, the opposite of Aquarius, Leo rules the heart. Under Leo we can live and act whole heartedly. We can give our all. Leo holds the esoteric key to Aquarian altruism, and to Christ in the Life Spirit. It is when we do things from the goodness of the heart, and for the Christ’s sake, instead of our own, that we become more free within ourselves. We also gain the corresponding, physical control, by being able to use the heart as a voluntary muscle, to direct the circulation to the areas of the brain that rule altruism. These are deeds we can do in the little things of daily life, that have big consequences. Perhaps for us, the watchwords “know thyself” should become “know thyself in Christ.”



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